Please don’t kick me to the curb, I beg you.

I have no one. I hope you’re happy. You take off and leave me, take all my friends with you, and turn everyone against me. My family sides with you, now Matt’s siding with you.

I’m completely fucking alone. Thanks for spreading viscous rumors about me and making everyone think I’m just some fucking batshit crazy person.

Everything you ever wanted is right at your fingertips. All you’re waiting for is me in a body bag, right?

I loved and trusted you. And this is what you do to me. I was loyal. And this is where my loyalty got me.

Why can’t you just wake up and be a human being and come fix this mess you made before it’s too late? I can’t keep going on like this. With no one… completely fucking alone… everyone hates me because of you!!! No one gives a single shit about me. So what’s the point???

Does this really make you happy??? Because if it does, you can’t even be human. Just pure fucking evil.

Shame me for having problems with self-worth and self esteem. Do all the exact things that press those buttons. See how many buttons it takes to get to the suicide center of self-loathing. And *I’m* the one with the “problem” who’s being forced to get “help.”

You’re pure evil. And I can’t stop loving you, even knowing this fact. I just want you to get help. Please get help. Please. Please stop pushing my buttons. Please stop lying to everyone about me. Tell my friends the truth so that they’ll unblock me and stop playing your fucked up games because I need their support a hell of a lot more than you do, obviously.

UPDATES!!! After this post, he sent me THIS email:

After I said he wants me in a body bag. He send me a push-you-over the edge email incriminating himself for snooping on my shit, because it’s the only way he’d even KNOW if I was “snooping his shit,” which I wouldn’t even call it snooping if it’s fucking public. Dopey-ass mf.

So here we have it. Proof he’s trying to push me to suicide, and proof he’s been snooping my journals and things JUST LIKE I SAID. Oh, and the “harassment” of which he speaks is me sending him a message on my birthday just to tell him how I feel, saying that that’s all I wanted for my birthday, and that I’d leave him alone for good after that.

So yeah. Keep taking his side. You’ll just be an accessory to his shitty behavior. Or you could come back to me, be forgiven, never speak of your betrayal again, and actually support the friend who always put her issues on the back burner to help you with yours.